Zip, zap, zoom

Hi handsome, finally, how are you? How was your day? Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes.

What are you doing? Checking me out, go right ahead, front to back, headlights ‘n’ tail lights, they’re all a functioning.

What’s that I hear? Ah, you’re making sure, this is your car, not your neighbour’s? Naughty! Quick hint, I’m the one with all the right angles ‘n’ curves. Size does matter, the bigger the better, what?! I’m only quoting what you said.

Too tired to drive, come, I’ll walk you through it.

Now hurry up, get hold of your keys- insert, fit, un-lock ‘n’ open.

Yes click right in front of the opening, open the door ‘n’ enter.

Oh, shut the door, but don’t slam too hard.

In the cockpit? Make yourself comfortable.

Settle down nicely, the car’s roomy enough to fit 1 or 2 more.

Security first, put your seat-belt on.

Let’s play some music, your choice.

The interiors are clean, smell pleasant too, huh? But a spritz or two more of that heavenly car perfume will be even better.

What? Feeling hot already?  Feel free to crank up the AC a notch or two or at full blast.

Now, best to lock down, privacy is important.

Checking the fuel tank? Not to worry, I’m well fed.

Make sure the gear shift is in neutral-a lil fondling ‘n’ hand holding should do. Warm it up.

Turn me umm…the ignition on, it only takes a spark, to get the engine going. Just wanna get the fire started at this moment.

Take a quick look in the mirrors. All clear. Hey! Enough, don’t get lost in my eyes just right now.

Let the clutch (grasp tight first) in ‘n’ accelerate, we should surge forward.

Start at gear 1,2… gradually 3.4,5,6 to pick up speed ‘n’ power. Shift gears as per your driving pleasures. Its smooth if ya move from one gear to the next ‘n’ then back down again, but feel free to do your own thing too boy.

Rev up the engine-Accelerate sharp, all depends how you wanna cruise. Use your gut feeling ‘n’ instinct.

Remember to have one foot on the brake at all times, to slow…but don’t brake too often either, it’s like sexual tension for the car, it’s meant to be moving with you, don’t resist the urge.

Best to drive meditatively, with 100 % concentration. Eyes on the road –enjoy the scenery, ears at full alert-every horny honk, hands on the steering wheel at all times, to steer the course-right, left or straight ahead.

What? Adrenaline’s kicking in? Your heart’s a racing? Feeling the rush? ‘N’ you want me to stop talking now…sure in a second.

Just a few final tips:

Let your joy be in the journey ‘n’ not only in the goal.

Driving is therapy ‘n’ escape too.

‘N’ remember she performs best when wet- keep her well lubricated.

Wish you a safe, comfortable ‘n’ happy journey.

Happy driving!


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